Manning Up

 It has been less than 3 days. Ally and Eli jettisoned through the dust to lovely London for 2 weeks. Many have asked if I was scared, nervous, or even mad. Heck no, this will be easy. There will be less maintenance and more enjoyment...

Well, crap. Thursday morning, Oli decides he wants to wear a green shirt, not the green shirt we just got for him, one that JJ spilled chocolate milk on yesterday and keeps crying. Oli then can't live without his "54" jacket, which of course is already in the car but he can't understand in his stupor of consciousness because he was up late watching me play the Wii...I kind of knew, but hoped he'd just pass out...he did NOT, and therefore cries/whines for several minutes. Earlier, midnight rolls around and both boys were in my bed, and I was not having that. As I carry JJ to bed he cries, as I carry Oli to bed he yells until he falls asleep 30 min later.
Fast forward. It's Friday, both kids at school I have a big mess to clean up. No problem, not a big deal, easy work. Here's the thing though, it's cool the first 10 times you pick up shorts. It's okay the first 5 times you pick up empty capri sun's, heck I'm a man, I contribute to the refuse on the floor. But seriously Oli you left cereal all over the seat, seriously JJ you peed yourself and left the leftovers ON my bed? WT...Within 2 days it wasn't cool anymore. By today (Saturday) I have grown restless of the same messes I have had to go over again and again and again. It never ends. And like the guy that I am, I just leave it for a bit, but then the boys go crazy in that element. I noticed if I clean it up they are more subdued, why? No idea.  Maybe mom's know that and just never say anything. Women tend to make mountains out of molehills, but my boys can multiply many molehills pretty damn quickly. Think I'm gearing up to apologize? No. That would be too easy. I will say that I get it now however. 
 

 Blogs are fun cause you get snapshots of the good times, but believe me, these are just that, snaps. I finally get it Al. But we have had a few funny things happen. First, Oli won the jackpot (see above) and he only cheated a little. Suck it Chuck-E-Cheese. 
Oli and JJ climbed a rock in the park and both stayed up for several minutes as I refused to get them down. JJ finally jumped to me. Oli eventually fell/slid off. 

 Balloons. Kids love balloons, mine wrestle-bounced with them. Not to mention, JJ ran laps around the chapel, literally laps. I was pumped thinking by the time we get home he'll be out....Nope. He was wide awake till 11pm. What have I done?
     The problem is, that if kids stay up late, they don't sleep in. They get up at usual time of 7:15 (not including the sleep walk into my bed at 3) and are complete tool bags all morning and afternoon till they have that late nap and are bearable again...but then they aren't tired until after 11pm (vicious cycle really).

 So after a day involving 2 parks, 1 playplace, a few hours of Mario Galaxy and 1 nap the boys were calm. We started making cinnamon rolls and during that span JJ fell off the couch, Oli spilled a bowl of pecans, JJ spilled his PB&J all over the table and floor. Oli was crying for corn dogs, tater tots, the i-pad, and that went on. JJ kept opening the fridge obsessed with eggs as if they were novel and an excellent toy to play with. I could be the fun dad and make a mess with them, or throw them outside...but if I do that, then it's a free-for-all and the game won't stop. Redirect time! JJ finds his way back when my back is turned.
Are they ready? Are they ready? Are they ready? No Oli. Are they ready? Are they read-NOOOO! Oli is still asking questions about everything. Dad, what letter does ball start with? My trick, is to ask him the same question, sometimes works, sometimes leads to more questions. As I made this illegal recipe from a place that rhymes with Sin-a-ton, I re-lived the last few days to realize how long Ally has dealt with worrying about the cleanliness, order, and entertainment of the boys while I am busting my brain over theoretical and statistical analyses about boring theory and statistics. I thought Al and I had a 50/50 thing going, but really, it's 25/75 with cleaning at best. Sorry Al. Will that change?....let's just say that I'm scared for some sanity if they keep bringing it like this. I'd be happy to keep it at 25/75 and be in charge of school drop off's, whatever we do, by a fortnight I may have developed much improved habits though. So in the event of any perfected qualities I may have, please take notice and enjoy it.

But credit to the boys' timing. After I yelled at them a bit for fighting and dumping out the dirty laundry to play with the basket (who does that by the way?) they sat and were silent. Perfect timing to try my pirated desert. It's good too. Kids were being quiet and still. I think they could sense I needed 5, so they gave me 3 and fought over the corn dog you see in Oli's hand, of which was not consumed by either. 
     95% of the time, we are crazy. 5% of the time I couldn't be happier. But it's worth it. How on earth does that make sense?